Planning for marriage is one of the most exciting times of our lives. If you are about to get married and you are not excited, you should probably stop and ask yourself why you aren’t more energized. Most couples dream about their future together and discuss what they want out of life. This is a special time that all couples need before getting married.
Like all newlywed couples, however, I found out quickly that our plans for our lives don’t always pan out the way we expect. Life throws us all curve balls and the more prepared we are for those moments, the more smoothly we can traverse them. There is no way to be completely prepared for all of life’s surprises; yet, the more you and your future spouse discuss possible scenarios, the better.
Below are a few “what if” questions you and your future spouse should discuss. You won’t be able to know exactly how you will react in these situations, but it is helpful to see your boyfriend/girlfriend’s responses to these questions. Remember that once you are married, you are married for better and for worse.
- What if your spouse no longer desires to walk with God or wants to convert to a different religion?
- What if one or more of your parents get sick and have to move in with you and your spouse?
- What if you and your spouse are unable to have children?
- What if you and your spouse lose everything due to a fire, loss of job, etc.?
- What if one of you has an affair?
These are just a handful of examples of difficult questions you and your future spouse can discuss (we work through more of them with you in our premarital counseling program).
Obviously, the hope is that you won’t have to endure any of these trials, but it is good to think these scenarios through before you are faced with them so you can be a little better prepared if you and your spouse do have to walk through them.
Have you and your future spouse discussed any what if questions? If so, which ones?