This past week I’ve been cooped up in the house with an annoying cold. Tonight I went to Kroger (a local supermarket) and it was wonderful! An errand that usually gets on my nerves was wonderful to me after not being able to leave the house in days. Part of why I enjoyed it so much is because I went around 11pm.
The store was almost empty and I had all the aisles to myself, for the most part. There were enough people there that it didn’t feel eerie, but it was almost like having entire store at my disposal. It is no secret to those who know me that I am more alert at night than in the morning. My preference is to sleep during the day and be awake all night. Obviously that is not always feasible, but when it is, I thrive! My mom said that when I was in the womb, I would wake up just as she got in bed to sleep. ~smile~
Thankfully, Eric is a night owl too. It’s not always fun for him because he’ll stay up late and then have to get up early for work; but, he loves the night life (as long as he’s home on his computer ~grin~). It is helpful to our relationship that we both enjoy being up late. It isn’t a must have for marital success, but it’s definitely a plus.
If I loved to get up early and turn in early, he and I would not see nearly as much of each other; but, not only that – I would be at my best when he is at his worst and vice versa. For the purposes of discussing important issues and enjoying life together, it is best if both people are sharp and alert together for a significant time frame each day.
If you and your significant other are at your best during the same time each day, then that is an added bonus for you and your relationship. If not, it isn’t the end of the world, but it might cause some future problems. For example, if your future spouse wants to attend a party that begins at eight, but you like to be in bed (or need to be in bed) by 10pm, then that is likely to cause you both some frustration. On the flip side, if you are invigorated by watching the sunrise during a morning walk, you might be frustrated if your future spouse doesn’t appreciate the sun until noon.
After couples are married for a while, they settle into a routine. The fact the he likes to stay up late and she likes to go to bed early won’t necessarily be as annoying as it was during those first few years. At the same time, it pains me to think of couples missing out on so many hours of life together because one is sleeping and the other is up and raring to go. As hard as it may be, I recommend some compromise in this area.
As soon as you get married, start working together to create togetherness hours in the day. Most people work in the mornings (though not all), so if your schedules require that you wake up early to go to work, decide on a bedtime that will work for both of you and start working towards being on the same schedule. Your body will eventually adjust to your new schedule, even if your mind has a hard time letting go of your old ways. You’ll have more alert/rested time to be with your future spouse and family.
And maybe on weekends and special occasions you two can stay up late to watch a movie or get up early to see the sunrise. ~smile~
Are you and your boyfriend/girlfriend early birds or night owls?