My husband is off work this week and we are on our way to a mini vacation (coincidentally, it is also our one-year anniversary of our PreEngaged blog – so, thank you for reading and sharing us with others!). I am so excited. It is nothing extravagant, but it will be a change of pace and we will have time to hang out with no stress and few responsibilities. We have not gone on too many trips since we were wed – and when we have gone somewhere, it has usually involved family or professional training of some kind. So, what changed – how are we getting away now?
A few weeks ago, Eric popped up and told me that he wanted us to get away for a few days and I couldn’t have been more thrilled. I’m not one that needs to travel all the time; yet, like most people, I do need time to get away and breathe – and, like any married couple, we need time to get away and spend some quality time together.
Going on a vacation, even a small one, is no easy task for many couples. Between work responsibilities, children, church obligations, and other tasks, it can be hard to leave the technology behind and take off together. We have certainly found it difficult, but the more I think about our upcoming 3 day trip, the more I am convinced that couples need an occasional change of scenery to pull them out of ruts and reset their focus.
Before marriage, we spend so much focused time on our significant other and it’s hard to believe we could ever feel any differently about them. However, life happens, love matures, and before you know it, you and your spouse are up to your ears in responsibilities, leaving you little time to reconnect from day to day. No matter how long you are married, or how well you know each other, you need to have times of renewal.
Because neither Eric nor I live near our families of origin, it is tempting to save every vacation opportunity to spend time with family. As family-oriented as I am, I would be tempted to spend money as often as possible to see our families. Thankfully, Eric is there to provide some balance and remind me that we need time alone together once in a while.
A few years ago a co-worker, in her fifties, told me not to give all of our vacation time to family, even though they are not geographically close to us. She and her husband made that mistake and it was clear that she regretted it. It’s so easy to say, especially when you are young, that “someday” we will be at a good place financially and be able to travel at our leisure. Hopefully, with good stewardship of our money, that will be true – and true for you too. However, you don’t want to live your life in the future.
While I strongly recommend NEVER going in debt for a vacation (the worst vacations are the ones that follow you home in payments), I do recommend that you set aside a little money here and there to take a modest vacation at least every few years. In some cases, depending on the stress level you normally carry in your life, you may need to have getaways more often. However often you and your future spouse decide to go, just be sure not to neglect relationship recharging time. It’s important to take time to get away and recharge.
Where do you like to go to recharge?