This week we had the distinct pleasure of catching up with a wonderful couple who we still miss meeting with all these years later – Joe and Megan! This couple has an amazing work ethic and it is hard to remember a moment when they were not smiling and having a great time with each other. We do this work to bless other couples; yet, often, our couples end up blessing us!
Joe and Megan went through our pre-engagement program in the Fall of 2016 and our pre-marital program in the Summer of 2017. They met at Washington State University, both studying in the agricultural department. Providentially, Megan did her graduate work on Joe’s family farm and thus a friendship, and later relationship, was formed. Megan notes having a scientific mind and wanting to be fully informed before getting married as her reason for seeking out pre-engagement coaching – and because she thought it made more sense to get counseling before making a life-long commitment. (Yes, Megan! We agree!)
Joe and Megan currently live in Northern Idaho and are entering escrow on their dream home! Enjoy their story!
Highlights from the Interview:
- They were surprised how naturally they flowed from single life into married life.
- Their personalities matched each other well.
- They prepared well and could feel the benefits of that preparation right away.
- Marriage is “like being around your best friend all the time.” – Joe
- If they could have a do-over of their first year of marriage, Joe would immediately give his two-week’s notice at his job.
- Working 100-hour weeks is not ideal for newlyweds!
- Joe’s advice puts us in mind of the following verse: “When a man is newly married, he shall not go out with the army or be liable for any other public duty. He shall be free at home one year to be happy with his wife whom he has taken.” (Deuteronomy 24:5, ESV) Though we no longer live under Old Testament laws, this is still excellent advice for newly married couples.
- Developing and solidifying relationships is important for newlyweds.
- To prepare for marriage, they:
- Discussed a large number of topics.
- Did additional pre-marital counseling with their pastor.
- Read books on relationships and marriage.
- Put in a lot of effort leading up to marriage! “It’s a life-long thing so you’ve got to work your butt off leading up to it to prepare. You can’t just slack off and think it’s all going to be hunky dory.” – Joe
- (… and more in the interview!)
- Shared goals and shared mission have been incredibly important to them.
- They both want to be independent and self-sufficient (together), they want to work in the same field (literally!), and they have passion for their shared work.
- “Every decision that we make and everything we do goes back to those shared values so that makes our decisions and thought processes a lot easier because we share them. I think there would be a lot more conflict if there was different vision.” – Megan
- Advice for future couples?
- Joe – “Date long, short engagement.”
- Megan – “Choose wisely and treat kindly.”
- You need to identify your core values and stick to them no matter what. When you are considering a marriage partner, know your deal breakers.
- How did they know the other was “the one”? They are happy to tell you in their interview!