Saint Patrick’s Day is a beloved holiday celebrated by millions, but for me it holds a different significance. This coming Saturday marks the twentieth anniversary of my most significant breakup. It was not my most painful breakup. It was not even my most traumatic. However, it marked the end of the worst relationship I have ever experienced. For months, through tons of his mind games and breakup threats, I desperately fought to keep him. Those other pathetic girls I silently judged... I had become one... and it felt terrible. He emotionally pounded me into the ground like a railroad spike … [Read more...]
7 Tips on How to Break Up in a Healthy Way
The sanctuary doors of the church open. Our loved ones are there to celebrate our union. As I begin to walk down the aisle towards the “love of my life,” I feel a terrifying sinking feeling in my gut. I suddenly realize... I cannot marry this man. At this point, I panic, turn, and run away leaving my jilted groom heartbroken at the altar. The plot of Runaway Bride is a reoccurring dream of mine. Though this particular dream does not plague me as often now as it did when I was single, it still hijacks my sweet sleep occasionally and it takes on different forms. One time, I was at the … [Read more...]
The Blessing of a Clean Breakup (Not Stringing Your Ex Along)
Years ago, I gave my mom a plaque which read, “Everyone brings joy here. Some when they enter and others when they leave.” It was gifted to her in good fun, but we all know someone who brings joy to a room simply by leaving it. Perhaps we should make it a life goal to avoid being that person. ~smile~ As much as I want to be welcomed everywhere I go, sometimes I need to stay away from certain people and situations. This was never truer than during my dramatic teen years. Sometimes I cringe when I remember teenage Heather! Heather, You Cannot Be the One to Comfort Them At the end of my … [Read more...]
Should I Revive a Relationship with My Ex? (Seven Questions To Ask Yourself Before Re-taking the Plunge) (Ex Week, Part 1)
So, you and your lady or gentleman broke up a while back, but you are starting to wonder if you should give your relationship another shot. Such a big decision can leave one’s head spinning. “Should I? Should I not? Will it be a disaster? Am I missing out on something that could be great?” There is so much to consider before retaking the plunge, so here are seven questions to ask yourself before you make your choice. What is my motivation for returning to this relationship? Do I love this person and see a confident future? Is the relationship familiar and comfortable? Am I ready to … [Read more...]
Five Signs You Should Disconnect and Run! (Disconnections, Part 2)
This year on PreEngaged, we have been focusing on the idea of connecting with your sweetie! We do believe strong connections are essential to happy, healthy marriages; but, sometimes, on the road to matrimony, we choose to connect with people who are not good to connect to. Have you ever connected with someone and then thoroughly regretted it later? If you have, you are certainly in good company. There are a number of connections that I made as a young woman which I sincerely wish I had not. And, I did not walk into them blindly, as much as I would love to blame it on age and immaturity. I … [Read more...]
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