3… 2… 1… Happy New Year!!! Welcome 2014! How are you celebrating this New Year’s Day? Sleeping in because of a late night last night? Are you up and at ‘em early to get a head start on conquering the new year? Maybe today seems like every other day?
What I love about the beginning of a new year is all the possibilities it holds. Thanksgiving and Christmas are so close together that I often emerge from the holiday season feeling sluggish and unaccomplished (though I love me some Christmas!), and the new year gives me the opportunity to look at life fresh and make plans for the next year.
We have probably all experienced the aggravation of making resolutions and then fail to carry them out. Many years, I have said, “I’m going to lose weight!” and then by Valentine’s Day, I’ve lost my fervor. ~smile~ But goals are different than resolutions! Resolutions, in my experience anyway, have been best hopes. I hope to accomplish this task. I hope to conquer this area of my life. Goals are plans. Goals come with steps to follow. Goals have a beginning and an end. When you really want to accomplish something, write down a step-by-step plan to master it! The odds of you completing your resolutions are far greater when you turn them into a goal!
We have a lot of mini-goals for our individual lives, but have you ever thought about making New Year’s Resolutions (goals) for your relationship? Just as we need to keep growing, our relationships need to grow as well. So, it’s time to get out that trusty pad and pen again and start listing some goals for the new year. What new heights do you want to reach with each other this year? What fun goals do you have? Are you hoping to reach a financial milestone this year? Do you have a checklist of “to do”s you need to complete before getting engaged? Maybe this is the year you can check them off!
Categories in Goal Setting
I would recommend writing down about five to ten categories (e.g., financial, spiritual, social, etc.) and making a goal or two for each one. Make these goals clear and attainable. If you pack too much into one year you may become overwhelmed and want to throw in the towel on all of your aspirations. You will want these goals to propel you forward, not keep you and your sweetie in constant turmoil. ~smile~
Consider these sample goals:
- Save $1,000 a piece to go towards the wedding (or any financial number reasonable for you both).
- Plan to go out with another couple at least once a month (or as many times as works for you both).
- Memorize 10 Scripture passages together this year.
- Practice conflict resolution exercises at least twice a month.
- Babysit together once a month for a family with young children.
- Find one or two older couples to get to know this year (i.e., take them to dinner every couple of months and seek out a mentor relationship).
- Train for and run a half marathon together this year.
- Take a ballroom dancing class together in preparation for the wedding.
- Find creative ways to have fun together on a budget so you can put as much money as possible towards paying off your consumer debt (note: each of you should pay off your own debt unless you are married… it is extremely unwise to combine finances until after you are married).
- Complete a pre-engagement counseling program this year in preparation for engagement. ~smile~
When Eric and I decided we wanted to be free of student loans and our car payment, we were focused. We threw money at our debt and felt the freedom that came from completing that goal. When you are focused, you can accomplish a lot! When couples are focused together, one person can be strong while the other is weak. You and your sweetie can accomplish a ton if you both set your minds to it!
What are some relationship resolutions (goals) you and your sweetie have for this year?