In graduate school, I recall one of my professors talking about a student who turned in a paper worthy of receiving a “D” grade. Deciding to give the student grace, he gave the student a “B.” What do you think happened?
The student found the professor and disrespectfully complained about his grade. I’m not sure if he demanded a grade change or not, but at any rate, he caused a scene over his low “B” grade.
First of all, I was floored at the thought of bombarding a professor in such a way as this student did, but I was equally amazed that he could write such a poor paper and still have every expectation of receiving an “A.” Though there is such as concept as an “A for effort,” I don’t think it applies to graduate school level term papers.
Entitlement is an attitude that is running rampant in our culture today – especially in the younger generations. Someone with an entitlement mentality believes that he or she should receive certain benefits (e.g., free goods or services, free education, jobs for which he or she is not qualified, etc.) simply because he or she exists. It’s a mentality that lives out: “Since I breathe air, and I live here, I should, therefore, be given what I want.” In short, someone with an entitlement mentality believes that he or she deserves to receive items, services, or grades he or she has not earned.
So why is having an entitlement mentality a turnoff? Usually, it is paired with a poor work ethic. Someone who believes in hard work isn’t going to expect handouts. This is not to say that we shouldn’t accept help when we need it (e.g., layoffs, unexpected medical bills, etc.), but a hard-working man or woman is going to want to pay his or her own way instead of expecting to reap the benefits of someone else’s work (after all, someone had to pay for the good or service).
There is also an entitlement attitude which says, “Everything should be solved without any (or minimal) work.” It’s an attitude that says, “Education should be easy. I’m a customer of the school and should be given what I want” (i.e., good grades) instead of “The school should challenge me and my grades are the result of my work (or lack of work).”
Along with the above mentalities, there is an additional entitlement idea which says if something is not easy, then it is not worth the effort.
Do those with an entitlement mentality turn you off? Have you ever dated someone that acted as if the world owed him or her something because they breathe air? It may not seem that annoying at first, but if he or she expects the world to give, give, give then he or she will also expect you to give, give, give – and chances are you won’t be receiving nearly as much as you are giving.
This person will want to have a lot of fun with minimal work. This person will probably want chores done with minimal effort (i.e., you’ll be doing it or it won’t get done). This person will likely have a bad attitude when he or she doesn’t get his or her way. Yes, I am painting a grim picture, but I believe it’s a realistic one. ~frown~
There are people my husband and I know who are like this – and we want to tell others who are interested in them for marital purposes: run! (at least as long as they have this spirit and mentality.)
Notice your boyfriend or girlfriend. How does he or she interact with the world? Does the result of hard work make him or her feel good? Is he or she willing to wait for items, or do desirable purchases have to be made immediately regardless of finances? Does immediate gratification for them take way too long?
Pay attention to your sweetheart’s attitudes. Whatever attitudes he or she has now will probably be magnified after marriage. Believe me, a hard working man or woman who does not live beyond his or her means is a treasure beyond measure! ~smile~
Does your sweetheart expect to gain goods and services he or she has not earned? If so, how do you think such a dynamic would play out in a marriage?