New love is so exhilarating; it can leave you feeling like you’re floating on air. In fact, when trouble comes your way, such as a bad day at work or a fight with a friend, you can sit back, smile a silly smile, and think, “At least I have my honey!” Though new love slowly turns into experienced love, it is still fun to reminisce about those early butterfly days when you are years into your marriage. New love is awesome… for you and your sweetheart, but sometimes it can be a source of dread and boredom to those around you depending on how you handle it.
When I was in high school, I can remember being around a girl who had recently been swept off her feet. While I was certainly happy for them, I found it difficult to sit through repeated stories and comments about his many attributes. Every conversation we had went back to her boyfriend like a Valentine’s Day carousel.
Lest you remember me from my teen years and feel like shouting, “Wait, sister! You did the same thing!,” let me beat you to the punch and say, when I was a teenager (and as a young adult), I made the same mistake. I’m sure many heads nodded, eyes rolled, and bodies uncomfortably shifted listening to me drone on and on about my latest boy interest. Friends, Mom, Dad, Granny, cousins, Miss Betty, sweet old ladies – they all got an opportunity to listen and listen and listen.
When we’re crazy about someone, it is natural to want to talk about him or her to others. If we let our mouths run away unchecked, we will likely spend hours talking about our significant others while our audience sits and wishes they could disappear. So if you’re in a new relationship, pay attention to how much you talk about your relationship to others. You should spend some time talking about your relationship; otherwise you will give off the impression that you are not very interested in your boyfriend or girlfriend, but be careful not to dominate the discussion with the topic. Start conversations by asking the other person something about his or her life. Getting in a habit of doing so will help alleviate the temptation to immediately start sharing love stories while you are on cloud nine. ~smile~
So, how can you know if you are boring the life out of your friends and family by talking about your sweetie? Here are four ways to know if you boring others with your relationship:
- When you are talking about your relationship too much, others are constantly yawning, looking over your shoulder, or staring at you blankly with a “shoot me now” expression on their faces. Some people simply find no pleasure in listening to others talk about anything that doesn’t have to do with them. If you have a friend that acts bored any time you happen to bring up a topic that does not feature him or her, I wouldn’t consider this person much of a friend. But, if you have an amazing friend who is typically a great listener and yet you find that he or she begins to stare and drool when you talk about your special someone, you may want to take notice of how long and how often you bring him or her up in conversation. People get annoyed when every subject finds its way back to your loved one.
- When you are talking about your relationship too much, others offer snide remarks and quickly change the subject. A surefire way to know that someone is annoyed with you, or what you are talking about, is when they offer snotty, snide remarks. This is an immature way of handling a situation, but if you find that others are making overly fake, nice comments about you and your sweetie or that they have a smart aleck response for everything you say about your sweetie, you can bank on the fact that they want you to shut up. After some time passes, you may want to ask them (kindly) if you are talking about your honey too much. It could be that you are or it could be that they are angry about something else but don’t know how to approach the subject with you. If people are cutting you off and constantly changing the subject, you may want to address that as well. Some people are simply rude. Others just can’t take it anymore. ~smile~
- When you are talking about your relationship too much, you find that others are suddenly busy when you suggest hanging out. People will listen to you for a while. They’ll even act excited for you for a while. However, when they start to realize that all of your conversations are going to go back to your honey pie, they will probably find something more amusing to occupy their time. If your friends always seem to be too busy, it may be time to have a heart to heart with them. During some of my former relationships, my friends would shy away from me because they didn’t want to hear yet another story about him and they didn’t want to be around us because we were too wrapped up in each other. Couples who focus all their attention on each other leave others feeling forgotten and foolish. Have you ever been out with a couple who couldn’t stop touching and sweet talking each other? Did you want to crawl in a hole and escape?
- When you are talking about your relationship too much, loving family and friends finally lose it and forcefully ask you to please stop talking about your boyfriend or girlfriend. We all have our limits. Even sweet, tolerant, long suffering friends and family occasionally snap when they are dragged through the deep, dark, recesses of your love life for too long. Going on a roller coaster once is fun, but after about ten times in a row with no stops, any one is likely to yell, “ENOUGH! Let me off this ride!” Take notice of your habits now so you can avoid ever getting to this point with your loved ones. It’s better to take precautions early than to risk hurt feelings and damaged relationships later. The person you’re dating may or may not end up being your spouse, but your friends and family will be with you for years to come. Remember that no matter how amazing your life may feel now, your friends and family are still living too, and they appreciate you having time to hear about, and care about, what’s going on in their lives.
New love is grand. Enjoy it, but don’t let it take you away from all the other amazing people in your life. Find ways to bless others with your relationship instead of pounding them with it.
Do you have a tendency to talk about your sweetheart incessantly?