Do You Have a Relationship Calendar?

When I was a kid, I used to automatically think of a food item when I heard a day of the week. Hearing “Thursday” still makes me think of fried chicken in my elementary school lunch room; Monday meant small square sausage (or some other unidentifiable meat) pizza; and Fridays were long, triangular, pepperoni pizza (which meant “party time!”). Tuesday was chicken nuggets and Wednesday ordained “whatever it is, it’s nothing to get excited about.” Those connections are still made in my mind because they were repeated constantly for six years of my life. For the most part, I looked forward to my culinary week; yet even now, I don’t get super excited about Wednesdays ~smile~.

Why not create your own associations for the days of the week? With your boyfriend/girlfriend, sit down and write down something special that will happen consistently on each day of the week. These will give you both something small to look forward to together each day. Maybe you love Thai food? There could be a “Thai Tuesday” on your calendar where you get takeout from a local Thai restaurant. Some may choose to keep a food theme; whereas, others would likely get tired of having their food choices dictated to them week in and week out. Maybe there is a game you both like that you could plan to play for about an hour on Thursday nights. Perhaps you both enjoy walking together but can’t do it every day – you could incorporate a short Wednesday walk. Whatever you choose, it needs to be something you can stick to during most normal weeks; it also needs to be an activity or experience that both people enjoy. Doing this exercise can help you find out more of what you and your partner have in common and it is a way of ensuring that you will make time to do them regularly.

Unlike my elementary school lunch schedule, your relationship calendar can also switch things up from time to time. Since you both are the authors of your plan, change it when you both think it’s time to experience something new; but, if you drop an activity (say, Thai Tuesday), be sure there is a suitable replacement (how about: Tiramisu Tuesday) waiting to fill the day. Life is lived through the little things and it’s important to plan to enjoy at least one little thing together each day. Otherwise, the days will slip away and you will have few cherished memories socked away in your mental hard drive.

This exercise is meant to be fun. Therefore, if you get into a fight about which day should be what activity, you may want to take a step back and do this exercise later when you’ve had more rest. The point of this calendar is to bring you closer together. So, take out your pen and paper and while you wait for your food to come to your restaurant table, start brainstorming ideas for special weekly food, fun, or other experience. All that really matters is that you both agree on them, and that they are experiences to which you both will eagerly anticipate!

What’s on your relationship calendar?