I have been a relationship expert since I was twelve. ~smile~ Ever since I was old enough to understand that I liked boys and sometimes they liked me back. Fast-forward ten years, add a bachelor’s degree in psychology and a year of graduate school to the mix, and I really thought I knew a thing or two about love and all that good stuff. Eric was sixteen when he believes he was called into counseling. He has always had an interest in relationships as well. We were a match made in Heaven – or were we? What happens when you marry off two marriage “experts?” Confusion? Arguments? Unmet … [Read more...]
Three Tips to Experiencing Healthy Conflict
“Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.” (James 1:19-20, ESV) How much healthier would our relationships be if we took God at His Word and actually followed the admonition of Scripture? In our foundational pre-engagement program, we give our clients tips and tools for engaging in more productive, less damaging conflicts. We actually believe disagreements can be good for relationships. They challenge our thinking. They show us the other side of the coin. They strengthen … [Read more...]
Three Tips to Experience Excellent Communication
When Eric and I started dating, communicating was no problem. I was visiting my parents’ house in another state and we had a standing phone date. Wild buffalos, swarms of flies, and rising waters could not have kept me away from that 9:00pm phone call! Fast-forward ten years. Eric gets off work, drives home, and walks in the door. He greets our golden retriever, happy to see him. I am cooking and he hugs me as he passes by. He flops on the bed for a few moments of rest. I finish cooking dinner, we eat, and then we get up and go about our evenings. He has work to finish and I have work to … [Read more...]
The Price of Freedom (and a Heartfelt Thank You to our Military) (Experiencing Freedom, Part 3)
To the thousands of men and women who gave their lives so that we could be free, I can never thank you enough. Freedom is never free. Someone always pays the bill. It was brave men and women – brave in ways I find almost unimaginable – who paved the way for us to be free to date and marry who we want when we want. They made it possible for us to choose where and how we want to live. It is because of them that I was free to make so many relationship mistakes. Freedom is so ingrained in our American culture that most of us have no idea how valuable it truly is – to the point that many are … [Read more...]
Five Lessons I Learned from Repeating the Same Relationship Mistakes (Experience Freedom, Part 2)
Embracing the truth sets us free. The truth can be unkind, unloving, and unconcerned with feelings, but it is still the truth. From age twelve to twenty-one, I seemed compelled to hide from the truth – the truth about myself, the truth about my actions, and the truth about love. The television drama version of love seemed more appealing to me than waiting for real love. What child likes to wait for anything good, after all? At times, I wonder if relaying my past mistakes will do any anyone any good – and I wonder that mainly because I am not sure it would have done me any good. I read I … [Read more...]
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