In the past two posts, we’ve discussed the relationship cycles Emerson Eggerichs’ talks about in his book, Love and Respect. The first two cycles are the crazy cycle and the energizing cycle... so what is the rewarded cycle? Nothing to Do with Us The rewarded cycle has nothing to do with us pleasing ourselves or each other, but it has everything to do with pleasing God.  In short, the rewarded cycle says says: "His love / regardless of / her respect / regardless of".  This should be read: His love regardless of her respect. Her respect regardless of his love. If you were to talk to a … [Read more...]

So, if the crazy cycle starts because he reacted without love and she reacted without respect, how does the energizing cycle begin? The energizing cycle is a blessing for couples and it begins when he shows her love or she shows him respect. It may not always feel natural to begin the energizing cycle, but the results are worth the effort required to take that first step! Consider this scenario... John comes home from work feeling completely wiped out. He knows he’s not in the greatest mood so he takes a few minutes and prays for God to calm his nerves and give him a peaceful attitude. He … [Read more...]

One of my absolute favorite relationship books on the market is Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs. One of the reasons I LOVE this book is because Eggerichs takes seemingly common sense concepts and teaches them to us in an applicable way. Wait, if the concepts are common sense, why do we need anyone to teach them to us? Well, after he demonstrates a woman’s desperate need for love and a man’s desperate need (yes, need) for respect and you start applying them, then the concepts begin to feel like common sense. Before reading this book, I had no idea how essential respecting my husband … [Read more...]