“Take your moods to God and your anger to your husband.” The classroom was full of blank and confused faces as we looked intently at our Marriage and Family Psychology professor who just uttered those words. Take our moods to God and our anger to our husbands? What is this man trying to teach us? In the Fall of 2002, I was still quite young, moderately naïve, and exceedingly unmarried. So, the thought of taking my anger to my husband did not hit me the same way then as it does now. Ten years later... ...sharing this message with our clients, Eric and I received some fully expected … [Read more...]
A Couple Simple, Timely, Communication Rules
“So, what do you have to say?” A frustrated and tired Eric asked me as I returned to our bedroom. Prior to me stepping out to the bathroom, Eric and I experienced an unpleasant verbal exchange. Without saying a word, I slipped out of bed and found two minutes of solace elsewhere. When he asked me to respond, I sat there silently, trying to find the words. Finally, the only phrase I could think to utter was, “I don’t know what to say.” At the time, my lack of response was annoying to Eric, but it was 11:30 pm, and the next day he and I were both glad we did not perpetuate the conversation. … [Read more...]
Will This One Simple Change Dramatically Impact Your Relationship?
“No.” Eric and I sat quietly at Texas Roadhouse and stared at each other. Though the preceding conversation had been anything but fun, I hated the brutal silence more than the unpleasant chatter. As I sat looking in my husband’s eyes, I felt a sense of fear, dread, and failure. On our wedding day, I stood before God and promised to respect and submit to this man; yet, here I was, looking him in the eye and blatantly refusing his seemingly simple request. “Will you keep track of how you spend your time during the day?” “No.” Part of me could not believe I was refusing him, but a bigger … [Read more...]
Five Tips for Simplifying Valentine’s Day
“Happy Valentine’s Day!” The attractive civil court clerk smiled her big toothy grin at me as I handed her documents to file. She was a vibrant newlywed who surely had amazing plans to look forward to at the end of her day; whereas, I was a teenager scorned (or, maybe just between boyfriends). Her greeting was common and in no way malicious; but, nevertheless, I felt a strong urge to punch her in the face. Valentine’s Day held no joy for me and I did not want anyone else to enjoy it either! Everywhere I went, there were hearts and flowers. It was annoying, quite frankly. Was everyone in the … [Read more...]
How Do I Know if it’s Time to Get Serious in Our Relationship?
The last few months were amazing! You have enjoyed some incredible dates, shared some laughs, endured your share of awkward moments, and are coming up on a pretty important crossroads. Dating has been fun, but what are we? Couples who hang out regularly for several months usually come to the DTR (define the relationship) conversation with a mixture of excitement and nerves. Are we just friends? Do we want to be more than friends? Are you ready for a commitment? Do you still want to date other people? Are we having the same thoughts about this? Is it time to take it up a … [Read more...]
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