“We really need to spend more time with other couples.” Ever since I can remember, my husband has desired a more robust social life, especially when it includes playing board or card games with other couples or families. Well over ten years ago, Eric and I had this conversation once again – we really need to spend more time with other couples. As the more hesitant one in our marriage, I heard him, dreaded it a bit, and went about my day. Not too long after that conversation, a co-worker of mine invited me to her house for a party. Several couples would be there, and chances were to be … [Read more...]

What is the most ridiculous fight you ever had with a significant other? When I ponder our marriage journey, a few silly conflicts come to mind. Our most notorious argument was in the Winnie the Pooh Store in 2007 when I accused Eric of losing our 4-year-old nephew. I yelled, “You lost him!” and he came towards me like we were going to throw down (not really, but that’s what it felt like). By the time we situated ourselves and ran out of the store, our nephew was safely in his mother’s arms. Another time, Eric got upset with me about something on a Friday night. He was so exhausted, my … [Read more...]

“Heather, I am going to drop you off at Walmart and have you walk up to strangers and say, ‘No!’” my best friend’s mother counseled my teenage self. Like many people, I struggle to say yes to the right opportunities and no to the wrong ones. Perhaps you can relate? In my fear of missing out on love and a happily ever after, I said yes to relationships which everyone else knew were doomed to fail. In my gut, I knew I needed to say no to my flesh and my fear; but, time and again, I batted my eyelashes at one wrong person after another. Though too proud to admit it, I was young, stupid, and … [Read more...]

Recently, I returned from a trip to what my friends and I affectionately call “the motherland,” where I spent some time with my mom, some beach time with friends, met a new friend, ran into an old friend, and spent a day thrifting with some of Mom’s friends. It was a week of friends. On the way to my mother’s home on the Fourth of July, I messaged an old and dear friend of mine to see if I could meet up with him for a few minutes on my way through his town. He responded that he was with his parents at their home and asked if I wanted to make a quick detour to come by and say hi to everyone. … [Read more...]

If you are like me, some days you feel like crawling out of your skin. If my routine does not shake up a little soon, I might just scream! At these times, I have to remind myself that social media is only the highlight reel of my friends’ lives and that everyone experiences some boring, mundane days. Weekends come and go, and typically Eric and I do very few noteworthy experiences. By Saturday evening, I am usually regretting our intense relaxation. Even two hours of something out of the ordinary (or even just getting out of the house) can be excellent for mental health and relational … [Read more...]