Okay, so I give my thoughts and opinions all the time on this blog. ~smile~ For the next few days, I am going to highlight some other folks’ thoughts instead. (And, I will sprinkle my opinion in there a little too. ~smile~)
What do others have to say about love and connection?
“Despite our ever-connective technology, neither Skype nor Facebook – not even a telephone call – can come close to the joy of being with loved ones in person.” – Marlo Thomas
This is a playful argument I have with my sweetie on occasion. He thinks connecting with others via online video is the best form of communication since the smoke signal, but sometimes I crave being in the presence of friends and loved ones. {Eric’s note: Just to be clear… what I said was that using Skype Google Hangouts, FaceTime, or software like that is a great alternative when getting together is not a feasible option. ~smile~}
Yes, I get to talk to my friends and loved ones on the phone and I get to Skype with them on occasion; but, something about those means of communication leaves me desiring to be physically near them all the more. However, since I cannot be near them as much as I would like, I am so incredibly thankful for technology which offers me the opportunity to hear their voices and see their faces. When I think about people in the 1800s loading a wagon and heading West (never to see their extended families again), I cannot imagine the grief they bore!
As thankful as I am to have the chance to talk to my parents on the phone as often as I fancy, and as great as it is to watch Eric’s family open Christmas gifts via Skype or FaceTime, it just is not as great as being there. Being able to sit in a room with someone you love is comforting. The joy of getting in the same vehicle and going somewhere together is priceless. Being able to give bear hugs is the best! Connection is not only verbal. So much about connection involves being together.
“For me, I don’t expect to have a really amazing meal each time I dine out. Having a good meal with your loved ones – that’s what makes the experience.” – Wolfgang Puck
Wolfgang Puck is one of the greatest chefs in America. Eric ate at one of his restaurants when he was on a business trip. It cost a pretty penny, but apparently it was well worth it! ~smile~ It is safe to assume that Mr. Puck eats, sleeps, and breathes food, and yet he is aware of the fact that good food is only part of the experience. He wants to enjoy great food, or even mediocre food, with his loved ones.
We can strive to make good money so we can enjoy the finer things of life, but if we do so at the expense of our close relationships, with whom will we share our good fortunes? With a thousand fair-weather friends? It is better to climb only halfway up the ladder with your support system than to reach the top alone… just sayin’.
“He who is void of virtuous attachments in private life is, or very soon will be, void of all regard for his country. There is seldom an instance of a man guilty of betraying his country, who had not before lost the feeling of moral obligations in his private connections.” – Samuel Adams
This is an interesting quote and it makes a lot of sense to me. Think about those who are able to commit heinous crimes or throw someone under the bus for financial gain. Are these people with close, loving, family connections? Most likely not. We receive our moral core from our family of origin. God’s grace can change our morals when He saves us, but we emerge from our childhoods with a sense of right and wrong. Some of us have a realistic sense, and some of us have a skewed understanding of right and wrong (e.g., whatever gets me what I want is right and everything else is wrong).
Those who are able to disconnect on a grand scale (e.g., commit treason, murder, etc.) have probably lost, or never had, strong connections with a support system. My closeness and connection with Eric, my parents, and my friends warms my heart. Even when I become angry, I have places to turn. My lack of desire to commit crimes is directly correlated with my relationship with God and others. Visit prisons all around the country and you will meet people with torn, tattered relationships. Some of them even have no one waiting for them back home.
Connections are not only good for us as individuals, but for the good of the land in which we live.
“We are all so much together, but we are all dying of loneliness.” – Albert Schweitzer
A close vicinity does not equal a close connection – I think almost all of us would agree on that. Night after night, thousands of couples sleep inches apart, but their hearts are miles apart. The following lyrics from Mark Lowry’s song, This Too Shall Pass, have always struck me:
“Sometimes I’m laughing with a crowd of friends and still I feel alone. There’s a place inside full of tears I hide that I’ve only cried alone.”
We live in such close quarters with other people. However, if we keep our hearts closed, and we don’t risk being vulnerable with others, we will feel like we are dying of loneliness. Connecting with others is life changing and eye opening, but connections do not develop without some risks. We probably will get hurt, but we need to keep trying. We were not built to walk this earth alone.
If you feel disconnected from loved ones, take baby steps to restore your relationships. If they do not meet you halfway, find others with whom you can connect. Take chances. Meet new people in church and in your community. Many of the people I am closest to are not related to me by blood, but I would not want to imagine life without them!
How connected are you and your sweetie? Do you need to spend some time this week strengthening that connection, or your connection with family and friends?